Met up with friends Learohero, JLo and The MD yesterday evening for a few pints and catch-up chat. There was general banter around the pub table but the main subject was relationships and more specifically, past relationships.
What transpired (without naming names) is that although time tempers most things, it is circumstance which usually governs how ex-partners feel about meeting up in later years. This is taking into account that they didn't split up too acrimoniously in the first place! It's particularly personal, meeting an ex-partner and depends on the mind-set of the people involved - eg some people won't meet an ex if they are still single and their ex is in a relationship, whereas others can and do.
As relationships are unique, people can come away from some totally cleanly whilst others are harder to shake. Then there are the rare amicable splits (eg mutual withdrawal) and the more common acrimonious splits (eg infidelity etc) which obviously govern how ex-partners interact with each other, if at all. In a perfect world, an ex-partner is somebody you once trusted and shared a personal experience with, and so after the amorous love has died there can be some remaining value in a platonic relationship.
The reality in most cases, is that the highly-charged emotions involved in a relationship and the loss of trust in the breakdown mean that this is not possible or desirable. Logically this is often for the best, although there are always exceptions in that some ex-partners manage to remain good friends, which is rare but nice.
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